We know it's the 21st century, and in another few years we'll probably have artificially intelligent robots fighting our wars for us. Still, there are people out there dedicated to old-fashioned combat -- the sort of elegant, hand-to-hand swordfighting that makes maidens and even modern-day chicks swoon. So to educate all the clowns in the back giggling about "swordplay," Asylum spoke to Brian Danner, a sword expert with a wealth of experience choreographing Hollywood fights.
"We get the rap that we might be those Renaissance Fair guys, we might be 'Dungeons & Dragons' nerds," Danner says. "We're not -- we're a cool group of individuals who just love the historical aspect, the poetry of the movement."
To determine whether or not you think Danner is the cool guy he portends to be and to find out how to live the sharp-edged lifestyle of what he calls a "violent dance," read on after the jump.
Heavy Metal Isn't for Everyone
With recreational or professional swordfighting, you're not really trying to kill anyone. (If you are, please refer yourself to a mental health professional immediately). This means that the swords you're using have to be designed to look impressive without risking mortal injury. Danner swears by a Burbank, Calif., company called Sword & Stone, which crafts sweet-looking weapons out of lightweight aircraft aluminum. "Aluminum on aluminum has a nice metal-on-metal sound. It's high-pitched, like a clanging. Steel-on-steel has a duller, hollow thud." And just in case you forgot: "It can't be f**ckin' sharp."
Find Your Hero Move
The "hero move", or "picture move" in industry parlance, is that signature, memorable moment of a fight. Danner gives the example of Brad Pitt during the opening moments of "Troy": "He runs toward the big guy at the beginning, leaps off what looks like nothing but may be an apple box or rock or something, sticks the guy in the neck, and just walks by and the guy collapses." (Once again, we recommend a hero move where no one is actually impaled.)
Does Size Matter?
"I always say it's not the car, it's the driver," Danner stresses when discussing which weapon is the best. A budding swordsman has plenty of options. There's the gladius ("a family of short swords, sort of machete-style") or the weighty broadsword ("you're swinging, usually two-handed"). Swords like that pack a wallop. "You get hit once, you're going to have broken bones, internal hemorrhaging, a lost limb ... " Then there are the more intricate swords, designed for a sort of surgical strike against the human body. "You can't discount a small sword, which is thin, like a car antenna. It's normally just the tip that's sharp, like a pin," Danner explains.
Dueling Basics
Step back to a day in which man-on-man fighting was quite different than it is now, and when duels were commonplace. "If you didn't like the look of my dog and you said something about it, I'd meet you behind the church and we'd have a duel over it," Danner says. "God was on the side of whichever man walked away alive. [The small sword's] a deadly weapon because of the speed of it -- I may not cut off your limb, but I'll cut you a little bit above your eye, your shoulder, your shin -- eventually you bleed out. You have what's called death by 1,000 cuts. Or I get a lucky shot and put it right through your eyeball or your heart or something." Danner says that it's this dueling style of violence that gave birth to the more civilized form of professional fencing as practiced at the Olympics, which generally involves less death and dismemberment.
Study the Classics
One of Danner's favorite swordfighting moments on film is in "Rob Roy"; the battle is between Liam Neeson and Tim Roth. It's a "long fight, little to no dialogue. Serious as hell. It's poetry in motion."
Another touchstone is that '80s classic, "The Princess Bride." For those inclined to more serious study, check out J. Allen Suddeth's "Fight Directing for the Theatre."
Lay Off the Muscle Milk
Just because the heroes of "300" look like steroid-jacked freaks of nature doesn't mean you should, too. A proper swordsman should stick to cardio and do his best to increase flexibility, not the size of his biceps. "Get on a bike, get on some Rollerblades, run your ass up a mountain, hit the stadium bleachers -- you've got to be fit to do it."
"Balance, flexibility and hand-eye coordination," are crucial, says Danner. "Endurance is huge. Yoga's the top of my list. It's not just physical balance, it's mental balance too. You can't put a sword in the hand of a crazy person. I like the meditative aspect."
Get Blade
"I was raised in Texas," Danner says. "I was raised to be a gentleman. I really believe that chivalry is not dead." And while some may (violently) disagree, we agree that there's something deeply ingrained in their DNA that makes girls fall for a macho, sword-wielding dude. "I don't believe in damsels in distress," he clarifies. "[But] there's that little excitement of someone standing up for you. If you have a story of a guy with a sword swinging in on a rope, or rowing in on his tall ship, or riding in on his white stallion ... there's something chivalrous, something romantic. Who doesn't love that?"
